Our Closets

Jean Zartman
Jun 7, 2020
5 min read

Recently I received a card in the mail. With all the craziness going on in the world and the pandemic in full swing, this "touchy-feely" card pulled at my heartstrings and sparked something deeper causing me to pause and think about the word "friendships." I am not talking about the "Facebook type of friends" you barely know yet accept their friends' requests. I am talking about a closet full of friendships that are made up of different textures, characters, colors, patterns, and uniqueness.

While I know many of you have been cleaning out and organizing your closets over the past few months, I haven't. My home of 320 sq.ft. comes with a closet the size of a postage stamp. I don't feel the need to clean out and organize my closet in the literal sense, instead, I think of the task in a more figurative way. There are different types of clothes that hang in my closet; casual, athletic wear, go to dinner clothes...and then there are...

And then there are...

...The clothes that you could wear every day and never tire of them.

These are called "your favorites." You know what I am talking about...the boots that fit like butter, the pj's that look goofy but you love them anyway, or maybe the leggings that had you at hello. My favorite? That's easy, a sweater. It is oversized and made out of the yummiest, softest angora wool. It's not perfect as there is pilling on the sleeves but I don't care. When I pull it over my head and slide it over my chest, I feel like a dearly beloved friend and I are hugging. It feels familiar and safe. Caryn H. is my angora sweater. We started our careers together 40 years ago. On her first day, we went to lunch and shared our stories and discovered we both had experienced the loss of our mothers. It was a conversation that felt so personal the thread of trust wove us tight. Ever since that first lunch, she has been hanging in my closet.

...The clothes that get lost deep into the dark recesses of the closet.

Remember when you wore your little black dress (LBD) with heels and a splash of lipstick? You looked like a million bucks. And more importantly, you felt like a million bucks!

Whenever I wore my LBD it brought out the wild, carefree, full of life side of my personality. It was magical. We shared so many fun times together I knew it had to be in my closet but where was the question. I hadn't seen it much less worn it in years. Chris P. is my LBD. For the last twenty years, that dress has been lost in the dark recesses of my closet. I missed it and I was determined to wear it again. Giving up was not an option. Last November I found my little black dress or rather, Chris P. We went to lunch, we laughed, we got caught up...it was just as magical as I remembered.

...The clothes you have no intention of buying.

Remember clothes shopping with your girlfriend? She pulls something off the rack and you instinctively know what's coming next. She says those simple, yet powerful words that throw any resolve you have right out the window "You have to try this on! You will look so good in it." Before you can figure what has happened, the clerk is wrapping up your purchase and handing you the sales receipt. Dianne R. is my purchase. I met her and the cloud of Patchouli oil that surrounded her while waiting for the Vashon bus at 2nd and Pine. Not only did she smell like the '70s, but she also drove a VW bug that I was sure was held together by duct tape. She felt so different than any of my other friends and yet, I found myself very curious about her. So much so, when she spoke I leaned in. She was over the top excited about a huge surprise birthday party she was planning for a friend. It didn't matter that I didn't know the birthday person, I wanted an invite. It never came. What did come was far dearer than any invitation. After 23 years and counting, I am forever grateful I listened to those simple yet powerful words "you have to try it on."

...The clothes that create"mix 'n match" outfits.

Those are the clothes you buy so you can mix 'n match them together to create enough new looks for every day of the week. Some stylist refers to them as the"anchor pieces" of your wardrobe. My anchor pieces are what I lovingly refer to as "my tribes." They are diverse, interchangeable, and make up every color of the rainbow. I love them! This winter I added a new mix 'n match collection to my closet. They are my RCB outfits to go along with my vintage trailer outfits, my sister outfits, and my book club outfits.

...The clothes you buy online sight unseen.

Now back to the card. Interestingly enough, the friend that sent me the card I met through the mail, literally. She was a holiday pen pal of sorts. Even though we had never met, she called out of the blue and invited me to her cabin for a girls' weekend. The cabin she spoke of wasn't exactly around the corner either. I am talking about having to buy a plane ticket, fly to Albuquerque and drive to Angel Fire outside of Taos New Mexico. Without hesitation, I said, "hell yes, I'm in." Michele O. is my dress I purchased online sight unseen. I went with my gut and it has been my best ever non-refundable purchase.

...My closet. Your Closet.

I wore silk blouses, suits, and heels five days a week, 52 weeks a year for most of my career. And while buying those clothes kept my Nordstrom personal shopper happy, I felt like my true self was being suffocated. It was a celebration when it was time to say goodbye. Out they went and I could breathe again.

I can honestly say I dearly love all the clothes hanging in my closet now. It has taken time, patience, and asking myself tough questions to get there. They make me feel like a million bucks and continue to enhance my life in ways I didn't think was possible. As I have learned, going through your closet isn't easy but once you do, oh boy!. There are new discoveries to be made that will add so many colors and textures you can't imagine them all, not to mention they come wrapped in the joy that will fill your heart.